Rainbows and Rubato

Last time, I briefly mentioned my Dangerous Hope. Well, it continues. My inbox is nothing but crickets. No rejections, but also no offers. It’s hard to feel motivated to query when there’s so much out there just dangling in the wind. “What is Rubato?” you’re wondering. It’s a Musical Symbol for when the musician disregards strict tempo for musical purposes, and also, my life right now as a querying author. The reason I feel this way: when it comes to agents using Query Manager for submission, I always get a near-instant rejection. I’m talking 24-48 hours, maximum. But, I’ve got two very particular queries out via Query Manager that are now two weeks old and no response. Total disregard for the typical, strict tempo! So unusual!

All of that to say, my brain is a whirlpool of possibilities. Are they reading my story…like chewing on it? Passing it around to colleagues? Doing some market research before they make a move? Or…is it just sitting in the inbox awaiting DECLINE? Did they go on vacation? Are they just overwhelmed and haven’t even gotten to my query? Oh my gosh, is this them calling now?!? Oh, no, it’s just another telephone scammer trying to get me with my car’s extended warranty! These are just a few of the ramblings in my head. My hope is dangerous.

I like examining my life and finding little good things. I like to think they’re tiny hints or good omens. This morning was one of those times.

At 7:30am my favorite bird, the Great Blue Heron, came bursting into my eye line through the living room windows. He was as dramatic as I’ve ever seen him! His landing was just wings and legs screaming for my attention and I was so excited! After he got his footing, he carefully approached the pond and began searching for his breakfast. I’m still just so honored he stopped by our pond for his first meal of the day! Jemma and I actually watched him snap up something from the water to eat and then a while later, he walked out of our view. I hope he had a lovely breakfast.

Then, my husband sent me a picture of a rainbow that he could see from his work. When I saw the text, I’d hoped it would bring goodness his way today. Very promising! Then moments later, we went outside and saw a completely different, but equally lovely, rainbow. Now that’s something! So, I’m going to call that not one, but TWO rainbows seen this morning.

And finally, after I got home from dropping Jemma at school, I took my coffee on the back porch. Not too long into my rocking and sipping, my skin was blessed with several drops of rain. Oh, merciful sky! We need this rain (said the old lady)!

That was it. I knew it! It was going to be a wonderful day!

So of course, that wonderful day IS GOING to include some sort of step forward in my writing journey, right? Right!!?? So dangerous, that hope! As I’m writing this, it’s 4:05pm, and NADA.

Otherwise, my day has involved my knee killing me, my bi-weekly visit to the chiropractor, a little shopping trip to TJ Maxx, and I finally made time to practice piano…because I WHOOPSIE volunteered to play piano for Children’s Choir practice at our church. Only, I haven’t played anything other than Christmas Music in about 15 years. So, reading the notes and getting them played at the appropriate tempo…yowza! Practice was rough! Ask my dog! Hopefully the children will be gracious.